Guarding Your Sanity: The Hilarious OSRS Grotesque Guardians Strategy

Are you tired of dying in the OSRS Grotesque Guardians boss battle, but still want to snatch up those juicy rewards? Fear no more! This article will provide you with a comically effective Grotesque Guardians strategy that guarantees success. From attack styles to gear, we’ve got you covered.

The Necessities

Before we dive into the core strategy, there are some necessary steps we need to take, such as recommended levels, gear and resources.

Recommended Levels

According to the Old School Runescape Wiki, for the Grotesque Guardians battle, the following levels are suggested:
– Attack: 75
– Strength: 80
– Defense: 75
– Magic: 75
– Prayer: 70

Gear and Resources

To participate in the battle, you will require the following:
– Granite Hammer or Blade of Saeldor
– Diagonal shield or Defender
– Slayer Helmet
– Torso or Fighter Torso
– Barrows Gloves, Fire Gloves or Regen Bracelet
– Bandos or Obsidian legs
– Dragon Boots
– Amulet of Torture
– Ring of Suffering or Ring of Recoil
– Rune Pouch filled with Earth runes and Law runes
– Stamina Potions
– Super Combat Potions

Having these items will go a long way in ensuring that our Grotesque Guardians strategy is successful.

The Hilarious Grotesque Guardians Strategy

First Phase: Dusk’s Shadow

Our first order of business is taking down Dusk’s Shadow. Here’s our plan of action:
1. Position yourself at the lower left-hand corner of the room
2. Use Protect from Magic
3. Use your Granite Hammer or Blade of Saeldor on Dusk’s Shadow until he has been defeated
4. If necessary, heal yourself with the “eat food” option

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Second Phase: Dawn’s Light

Once you’ve defeated Dusk’s Shadow, it’s time to face Dawn’s Light.
1. Position yourself at the same lower left-hand corner of the room
2. Use Protect from Magic
3. Use Verac’s Flail or your Granite Hammer or Blade of Saeldor on Dawn’s Light until she is defeated
4. Use any available healing options to ensure your survival

Third Phase: Grotesque Guardians

And now, for the main event: the Grotesque Guardians.
1. Position yourself at the same lower left-hand corner of the room
2. Use Protect from Magic
3. Use your Granite Hammer or Blade of Saeldor on the Grotesque Guardians
4. Switch to a diagonal shield or Defender when the Guardians become immune to melee
5. Use Fire Surge or Magic Dart on the Guardians while using Protect from Missiles
6. Always keep an eye out for when they are about to charge
7. Use your Rune Pouch to cast Entangle on them when they start charging to stop them in their tracks
8. Heal yourself when necessary, and keep slaying those Guardians

Top Tips

To guarantee success with our Grotesque Guardians strategy, here are some extra tips:
– Use your Rune Pouch to cast Vengeance on yourself to reflect back some of the damage you take
– Use Super Combat Potions to buff your stats
– Use Stamina Potions to ensure that you have enough energy to dodge attacks
– Be sure to bring a Ring of Recoil or Ring of Suffering for extra protection
– Always cast Entangle to stop the Guardians from charging
– Keep a good supply of food with you at all times
– Keep calm and never give up, even if it seems like the Guardians are destroying you

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A Hilarious Comical Alternative

But wait! That’s not all. There’s an even more hilarious strategy that promises a good time, but is not necessarily the most effective way to defeat the Guardians.
1. Gather a group of friends and equip full knight armour
2. Enter the Grotesque Guardians lair and let out your best battle cry
3. Proceed to charge at the Guardians with your granite mauls
4. Results may vary, but we promise, you’ll have a good laugh


There you have it, folks. Our hilarious and effective Grotesque Guardians strategy. Whether you go with the more serious Granite Hammer approach or opt for the hilariously comical one, we cannot guarantee 100% success. But, with our tips and advice, we hope that you’ll have a good time and come out victorious.

Remember, always have fun regardless of your tactics. Happy battling!


Attack Style Recommended Gear
Melee Granite Hammer or Blade of Saeldor
Ranged Fire Surge
Magic Magic Dart